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Ban Me /\v/\v/\v/\v/\ Contest - 5bps! Someone, somewhere, please make a good post! /\v/\v/\v/\v/\

Chawin

Avatar: 146808 2012-12-30 22:05:41 -0500
12

[Deth Krew 2010]

Level 69 Hacker

Scared of death

wizards, goatse, gay sex, tentacle sex, ghost sex, ghosts, goats, dogs,

[i]a story by me chawin ps. this isnt copy pasta i am writing this right now

there once was a magical wizard who lived in a field because he was quirky like that. he owned a dog and a goat, he called the dog doggy and he called the goat greg. one day when he was doing wizardy stuff he found a spooky and mysterious tower, the kind thats really scary and noone would never go in. steve (thats the wizard btw) wasnt like anyone else though because he was a wizard so he went to the tower and knocked on the door.

KNOCK KNOCK KNmale reproductive organ

noone was in which wasnt a surpise to steve the magician because it was obviously haunted so there was no actual people there. steve used a magic fireball to BLAST down the door and the door fell over. steve doggy and greg went inside greg going mehhhh and doggy going woof because they were very scared.

its ok said steve its only a spooky tower

they walked up the spiral staircase and found a deserted bedroom which was neatly made and clean. steve found this spooky because he knew only magic could keep a derelict house clean and he was afraid of a magic battle. it was ok though because doggy and greg were magicians too. thats another story because they use to be steves friends but it was a bad spell he cast lets not go there. anyway the three of them walked into the room and the door SLAMMED shut behind them. doggy and greg subsequently pooped themselves.

all of a sudden the bedcloths flew up into the air and caught on fire and then the fire turned into a scary naked female flame ghost who was really sexy but really scary.

hello said the ghost as she played with her clitorus are you here to satisfy my every need

yes said steve i am here to do that

greg and doggy ate their poop

but then BANG the cubbord doors flew open and trevor appeared naked and everyone was all wtf is going on especially doggy and greg because they were animals. well they werent but like i said its another story.

as the sexy fire lady ghost steve greg and doggy watched trevor bent over and stretched his bum really wide and everyone saw his colon and **** and it was disgusting. then thousands of tentacles flew out and they penetrated steve through his mouth and bum and held him up like a spitroast. trevor did this to greg too but greg is a goat so the sexy fire lady ****ed greg and then burnt and ate him.

doggy was all wtf but the sexy fire ghost wanted more so she stroked his large doggy wizard male reproductive organ and felated him and then let him stick it deep inside her mouth woman's genitals and bum and then came all over her fire chest.

while this was going on steve was being super raped but he didnt mind because it was tervor and its one of those things trevor does. then the sexy fire lady fisted trevor too hard and he exploded into fire so it was just sexy fire ghost and steve. by now steve had a 10inch long erection and was like

sexy fire lady ghost i want to **** you till you explode

ok said the sexy fire lady ghost

so she lay on the bed and they did it in all kinds of positions and she orgasmed like 100 times because steve is a magician and dw he didnt get burnt he used a fire spell to protect himself. then she gave him a tit job and he came in her mouth and then double fisted her so she could orgasm once more.

doggy was a bit bored so he masturbated in the corner. oh wait was doggy dead i cant remember.

anyway steve left the tower and went home with doggy and greg but i think theyre both dead so he just ate them.

btw the sexy fire lady ghost remembers this every night and fingers herself and its awesome because she uses a vibrator and everything

ilu 1337xxxxxxxxxlolololololololololxxxxxxxxx1337

super enjoy Log in to see images!

postin’

Snap017

Avatar: Keyboard Keys
6

Level 35 Hacker

“43 4f 44 45 20 4d 41 53 54 45 52”

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I’LL **** YOU WITH A RAKE.

Log in to see images!

Acidic Sheep

Avatar: Code (Blue)
4

Level 20 Hacker

“Buffer Overflower”

The sky was dark and cloudy. Wait, wait, no. The sky was gone. Because it was China, and they somehow managed to **** everything up and **** off god at the same time. The hobo named Acidic Sheep cast his eyes upwards, which was a bad idea, since the pavement had already started to melt from the rain. China rain.

He sighed broodily and flexed his remaining fingers, because he was a broody man, and brooding was what he had to do. (Plus, it was kinda cool back then.) The incident with the chainsaw left him with only with his pinky, and got him out of a job for juggling at a circus. (Kids, chainsaws and juggling don’t mix. ‘Twas a painful lesson I had to learn Log in to see images! kind soul would give him some BP. Many, many, times did he attempt to make BP out of dirt and a cupacke, but the evil ,evil, male reproductive organsucking trout denied this awesome, glorious muffin of mud, and cast him down into the depths of poverty once again. He lay down in his cardboard box, and waited, waited for this guy named 1337xxxxxxxx-xlololololol-ololololxxxx-xxxxx1337(****, that’s a mouthful o_o) to pbum him some BP…

D:

Pity him, you must

Send him BP, you are compelled to!

Because he is the heir to the king of Sheba, and will one day raise it to a glorious and awesome nation.

Now hand over the BP.

Acidic Sheep edited this message on 06/23/2009 8:28AM

Despite this line,

Acidic Sheep Posted:

He sighed broodily and flexed his remaining fingers, because he was a broody man, and brooding was what he had to do.

the rest was terrible plus don’t take my name in vain, ****.

Taenaron

Avatar: Code (Blue)
1

[7 VIBRATING DOLDOES]

Level 22 Hacker

“Mafiaboy”

“I am a Neonazi, he said. I smiled when I saw the Pope on TV right in front of him. He asked me with curiousity “Why do you smile?” he asked, I said “Nazis only fiddle with minorities, not kids.”

robotb3ar

Avatar: 186917 Tue Jun 30 09:32:15 -0400 2009

Level 25 Hacker

Half Robot, Half Bear, 100 percent Man.

So there I was all by my lonesome sitting in front of my computer. The room was dark today, darker than normal at least. I couldn’t put my finger on it at first, but I knew something had been out of place. Was it the junk that had been stock piling in my room and blocked out the windows? No, that stuff had been there for years. I scanned the room, attempting to find out what exactly it was that had brought this plague of darkness onto me. That’s when I found it “HOLY ****” I yelled to my self, for you see, the light bulb had died. That son of a **** had been there for years, always turned on, and I hadn’t noticed it until this very moment.

No biggie I thought to my self, I’ll just be able to get another one, every house has extra light bulbs right? Yes…but where exactly did I put those light bulbs, where in the hell could they be? I searched the hose frantically in the dark, because you see, apparently all of the light bulbs in the house had died. But I did not care about those ones at the time, no, I only cared about the single light bulb that had held sway over my head for so long. This one was not to be forgotten like the rest, no, this one shall have a new start!

How ever, to my dismay there appeared to be none in the house. I couldn’t possibly go outside to buy a new one, no, it was 3 in the morning, where the **** am I going to go now that could possibly sell a light bulb.

I returned to my room. So there I was all by my lonesome sitting in front of my computer. The room was dark today…

I just… I don’t even know what’s wrong with you people

Chawin

Avatar: 146808 2012-12-30 22:05:41 -0500
12

[Deth Krew 2010]

Level 69 Hacker

Scared of death

i thought my story was nice

it might win

Chawin

Avatar: 146808 2012-12-30 22:05:41 -0500
12

[Deth Krew 2010]

Level 69 Hacker

Scared of death

p much shows how **** flamebate is becoming imo

Crocen

Avatar: Woman's Abs
7

[Tormenting Evil Kn-
uckles of Satan
]

Level 35 Camwhore

“Legs Wide Open”

1337xxxxxxxxxlolololololololololxxxxxxxxx1337 Posted:

I just… I don’t even know what’s wrong with you people

This is the best post.

Indiana Jonas

Avatar: 13850 2014-12-19 09:36:26 -0500
13

[At Least I Never M-
ade A Failure Of A-
Website
]

Level 35 Troll

WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WW

Log in to see images!

SOMETIMES LIEF CAN BE P HARD AND GET u DOWN BUT JUTS FOLLOW THIS GUIDE AND YOU WILL BE HAPPY FOR ALL TIMES.

A GUIDE BY HOBART BLIGGITY

Ok so i know soem of you are not happy with ur lives (why else would you b here lol) and that sometimes things get rough in the ol’ livin a good happy life dept but I am here to hlep you take on the challenges of to day and live a happier life. See life sometimes cqan seem like its NOT FAIR and that poeople are OUT TO GET YOU but really you just need to take a step back jack (or jill) and realize that most ppl are good nice fun having a good times ppl and they really arent just out to f*** with you ppl ok? The sooner you relize this the sooner you can do STEP 1 to being happy and that is BE AHPPY ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE AND U CAN BE HAPPY ABOUT YOURSLEF.

Also sometimes it can feel like you are alone and dont fit in with everybody is different from you but thats ok its normal because you are unique so theres no way you fit totally in how would you like it if everybody was exactly like you pretty boring huh? Log in to see images! So you should be PROUD of you differents and learn to USE your differents to make things a better place because nobody is like you totally and can do things like you totally so only you can do things ur way see? When you see this you see STEP 2 which is EVERYBODY IS DIFFERNT SO LEARN TO BE HAPPY ABOUT YOUR DIFFERENTS.

Nobody likes black people. This is STEP 3 DONT BE BLACK.

lol i was refering to ur heart dont be black in ur heart bein black is ok in the 21st century ppl

Idle hands are teh devils playthugs and i can;t imagie the devil is a very happy person (its like 89 degrees here today an im miserable hell must b like 300 degrees lol way too hott to b happy) so u need to keep urself BUSY to be HAPPY. Teh more time u have to THINK about things the more time u have to be SAD about things so just keep urself busy and u will be HAPPY. As soon as you get ur bum moving (lol sorry) then you will get to SETP 4 which is A BUSY BEE IS A HAPPY BEE (this means you can bee happy about doing work (lol)).

Finally you p much have to believe in Jesus to be happy not sure really where this one comes from but I keep hearing it so I guess its some secret old ppl thing to being happy so STEP 5 is BELIEVE IN JESUS i guess.

There u have it a complte guide to being happy always if you follow these 5 EASY STEPS you will be happy always and have happy life to live for ever. Thank you for reading (although u shoud be thanking me lol) an I hope u get as much out of this as I do for the rest of your HAPPY life thanks again.

Thank you,
Hobart

*A guide by Hobart Bliggity*

nanalatinoje-
sus gets you-
JUSTICE IN -
YOUR FORUMS

Avatar: nanalatinojesus gets you JUSTICE IN YOUR FORUMS's
4

[Full of SbumSS]

Level 26 Troll

I SHOULD POST MORE BUT I DON'T BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL REALLY LAME

im gay

Indiana Jonas

Avatar: 13850 2014-12-19 09:36:26 -0500
13

[At Least I Never M-
ade A Failure Of A-
Website
]

Level 35 Troll

WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WW

nanalatinojesus gets you JUSTICE IN YOUR FORUMS Posted:

im gay

nanalatinoje-
sus gets you-
JUSTICE IN -
YOUR FORUMS

Avatar: nanalatinojesus gets you JUSTICE IN YOUR FORUMS's
4

[Full of SbumSS]

Level 26 Troll

I SHOULD POST MORE BUT I DON'T BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL REALLY LAME

irl ppl call me “adriana the homosexual”

nanalatinoje-
sus gets you-
JUSTICE IN -
YOUR FORUMS

Avatar: nanalatinojesus gets you JUSTICE IN YOUR FORUMS's
4

[Full of SbumSS]

Level 26 Troll

I SHOULD POST MORE BUT I DON'T BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL REALLY LAME

that is what i am and i will not be made to feel bad about it

Indiana Jonas

Avatar: 13850 2014-12-19 09:36:26 -0500
13

[At Least I Never M-
ade A Failure Of A-
Website
]

Level 35 Troll

WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWW WW

im just postin to snipe page 6

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