You are more easily judged on an action you took as opposed to an action you didn’t take. Therefore, bumuming the personal regret to be exactly equal, since an action taken achieves greater notice and more likely has more noticeable negative consequences (if you regret it).

I had them both.

But of course, regretting something that you did is more important, cause the effect of an action could scar you or mark you for life, and it’s even worst cause the effect can also involve you’r family or relatives.

And not doing something, could take away a moment of joy, but it’s not compared to the first. Besides, sometimes you do get a second chance to do it.

I simply don’t regret.

Things happened and there is no time machine to repair your mistakes.

I think the two shouldn’t be separated. Regret is the same feeling, either about something you’ve done or something you haven’t done.

Ugh ok last thing before I go to bed (I should really start sleeping again)

I guess I’m a little young to have too many regrets, so being in the fortunate position of neither marking my own or others lives permanently with my fail, I would say I regret missed opportunities far more in my life to date. I missed so many chances in my personal life over the last year or so, so I just say yes a lot more nowadays.

What I think it boils down to is how much you are willing to gamble with, and being at a young stage of my life I still double down a lot (****ty metaphor I know)

No I meant it more in a way of: if you were to make a decision purely based on what you feel at that moment, but you know it might be better for you if you don’t, would you do it knowing you might regret it later? Or would you not give into your feelings and just wonder what would have happened?

I’d rather regret something I did do as opposed to something I did do. When you regret something you did do, no matter how bad the outcome you at least know the outcome. When it’s something you didn’t do you live the rest of your life with that simple question; “what if?”

And for people like me who think about stupid stuff too much, that can eat away at your mind at times.

^

hivemind

CreepPipe Posted:

I’d rather regret something I did do as opposed to something I did do. When you regret something you did do, no matter how bad the outcome you at least know the outcome. When it’s something you didn’t do you live the rest of your life with that simple question; “what if?”

And for people like me who think about stupid stuff too much, that can eat away at your mind at times.

Overall I agree with CreepPipe. Of course the context means everything.

Pbuming on murdering someone and regretting it vs the regret one may feel for murdering someone?

– that is quite different than –

Pbuming on getting involved with someone and regretting it vs the regret one may feel when involved with someone and it’s not working out or it ends in a mess.

In the murder scenario I’d prefer to regret not doing it. In most other scenarios I’d prefer to skip the “what if?” I do think a certain amount of perspective is always involved.

scullyangel Posted:

Overall I agree with CreepPipe. Of course the context means everything.

Pbuming on murdering someone and regretting it vs the regret one may feel for murdering someone?

– that is quite different than –

Pbuming on getting involved with someone and regretting it vs the regret one may feel when involved with someone and it’s not working out or it ends in a mess.

In the murder scenario I’d prefer to regret not doing it. In most other scenarios I’d prefer to skip the “what if?” I do think a certain amount of perspective is always involved.

In the murder scenario, I would prefer to have done it and then regretted it later. Regretting later is indicative that the consequences that followed the action may have truly rehabilitated me… However, it doesn’t change the fact that I had, in fact, taken someone else’s life. I made a terrible mistake, had to deal with the consequences (my conscience and possibly jail), and in the end, changed. Even if I had deprived someone of their life, I learned and genuinely felt sorry. I do realize that this is not enough. I know that I would never be able to make up for it, but I would try. This may even mean that I regret the action so much that I can never forgive myself. I believe that my preference in this is illustrative of my desire to grow as a person (and in the worst of cases, even at the expense of others), which can, admittedly, be viewed to be as horrible as the other option.

Preferring the option of true regret that stemmed from a missed chance of murdering someone, in contrast, symbolizes a lot more than a vapid “oh, awesome, in this scenario I’m not in jail and at least I didn’t kill someone.” Imagine what kind of mindframe you would need to be in to truly regret not murdering another individual… Imagine a feeling of utter weakness that the only place you can derive strength is by shooting someone in the head. Regret is a strong emotion, and feeling it towards a missed chance of murder represents utter decay —the state you are in is so bad that you spend your days wishing you had taken someone’s life. This is a haunting image that resonates.

I guess it’s subjective. I think a murderer who can presently reflect on his past and legitimately be sorry is better than the guy who, in the end, is so ****ing torn apart that he, himself, wants to be the murderer.

My take, from advice and personal experience: the things you didn’t do will always haunt you deeper and longer than the things you did. “What If” is one of the most psychologically damaging phrases in the language.