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Art Dwarf Fortress: Castaways - Tales of Courage, Rum, and Homoerotic Tension

BirdofPrey

Avatar: 2037 Sun May 10 02:46:48 -0400 2009
10

[Team Shortbus]

Level 10 Troll

I lick her up afterwards (After her great times session too! Yum!)

18 Granite, 201

Sound effect: Waves crashing on a shore

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Pan up the beach, revealing David the dwarf, lying on the ground, sopping wet and motionless

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David stirs. Groaning, he weakly rolls over and begins to retch, spewing out an impressive amount of saltwater. Using the rock nearby he hoists himself up. He starts suddenly, reaching behind him. When his hand finds the copper pick-axe still wedged into his pants he relaxes, rebumured. Trudging down the beach, he scans the horizon but sees nothing.

David: HALLOOOO!

*silence*

David: HALLO? IS ANYONE HERE?

Distant Voice: HOOOO! OVER HERE!

The voice is coming from the hills to the east, away from the shore. David hurries up the steep incline.

Absolom is sitting by a small pool, fishing when David enters the scene. The surroundings here are more green and tranquil than the harsh rocky beach.

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Absolom: Hello there! I met you once on the ship, David, right?

David: That’s right, and you’re, um-

Absolom: Absolom Asmelzokun at your service! [Absolom steps forward and shakes David’s hand furiously, thrusting out his pelvis slightly.]

David: Er, right! [David extricates his hand from Absolom’s.] So, what does the situation look like? Any other survivors?

Absolom: I don’t believe so! As far as we’re concerned we’re the only 2 dwarves on the planet!

David: Uh…huh. [David suddenly screws up his face, sniffing the air.]

David: What on earth is that smell? It smells like… burning.

Absolom: Look for yourself! [Absolom gestures towards the east, where the ground drops away entirely.]

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David: HOLY ****! It’s a ****ing volcano! This whole island is a giant volcano!

David spends a few moments visibly composing himself.

David: Okay, we need to get our **** together! Absolom, stop fishing and look around for any other survivors, or supplies that may have washed up on shore. And when you’re done, set up a makeshift fishery so we can process those fish before they spoil. I’ll start carving out some living space. Our first priority is survival, after that we can worry about getting the hell out of here. Get moving!

Some time later, David is examining the pile of supplies Absolom managed to rescue, trying desperately to be optimistic:

- 1 copper pick (david’s)

– 10 plump helmet spawn (saved by Absolom before the ship was wrecked)

– 6 barrels of rum that had washed up on shore (praise Armok)

– About a dozen usable pieces of wood from the wreckage

Shrugging and choosing a place to start, David begins striking his way into the rock. Absolom, knuckle-deep in turtle entrails, keeps one eye on David’s rear end as he mines his way into the rock.

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BirdofPrey

Avatar: 2037 Sun May 10 02:46:48 -0400 2009
10

[Team Shortbus]

Level 10 Troll

I lick her up afterwards (After her great times session too! Yum!)

Rules: Feel free to make suggestions, though I have the right to ignore any and all of them. The better/more entertaining your suggestion is the better chance I have of taking it, though I must count out any actions that would end in death for either dwarf, at least for now.

iIRZ

Avatar: iIRZ's Avatar

[Team Shortbus]

Level 7 Troll

iIRZ is a funny fine upstanding member of society, which is to say that he did WTC and your mom

suggestion: make a good post

iIRZ was banned for this post by Evil Trout

iIRZ edited this message on 07/23/2009 2:25PM

BirdofPrey

Avatar: 2037 Sun May 10 02:46:48 -0400 2009
10

[Team Shortbus]

Level 10 Troll

I lick her up afterwards (After her great times session too! Yum!)

iIRZ Posted:

suggestion: make a good post

sugestion: get banned you horrible person!

Wylin

Avatar: 19712 Thu Mar 26 21:15:20 -0400 2009
35

[Brainfreeze]

Level 69 Troll

Causing Jealousy On The Internet On A Daily Basis.

I don’t understand the graphics, can we have a key?

Move: Have David turn around and catch the other dwarf [not working on getting the fish prepped] and tell him to get to work or he won’t be able to share the shelter you’re making for them.

Inertia

Avatar: 60995 Fri Apr 03 12:59:05 -0400 2009
34

[Shii is gay]

Level 35 Troll

also wow i have no male reproductive organ

Lol are you hacking Runescape?

BirdofPrey

Avatar: 2037 Sun May 10 02:46:48 -0400 2009
10

[Team Shortbus]

Level 10 Troll

I lick her up afterwards (After her great times session too! Yum!)

Wylin Posted:

I don’t understand the graphics, can we have a key?

Move: Have David turn around and catch the other dwarf [not working on getting the fish prepped] and tell him to get to work or he won’t be able to share the shelter you’re making for them.

Yeah sorry I forgot how hard it is to figure out what’s what for a non-player. The blue tildes are the ocean, triangles are ramps, (up or down depending on slope), grey commas and stuff are normal rocky ground, green commas are grbum and shrubbery, the green spade/club things are trees.

Big solid black blocks (with borders) are solid rock/sand. The brown areas of the rock in the last picture are areas that I’ve designated to be mined out. The little bearded things are the dwarves.

Wylin

Avatar: 19712 Thu Mar 26 21:15:20 -0400 2009
35

[Brainfreeze]

Level 69 Troll

Causing Jealousy On The Internet On A Daily Basis.

Wylin Posted:

Move: Have David turn around and catch the other dwarf [not working on getting the fish prepped] and tell him to get to work or he won’t be able to share the shelter you’re making for them.

Maybe I’ll be able to see it better as it progresses or I look at it more but I’ll translate what I said:

“Have David turn around and catch the other dwarf checking him out, have him tell the other one that if he doesn’t get to work he won’t get to share body heat later.”

Physics

Avatar: 83756 2009-10-01 09:57:31 -0400
19

[Phantasmagoric Spl-
endor
]

Level 69 Hacker

Making laws and snuggling dark matter.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dwarf_Fortress

interesting. Log in to see images!

BirdofPrey

Avatar: 2037 Sun May 10 02:46:48 -0400 2009
10

[Team Shortbus]

Level 10 Troll

I lick her up afterwards (After her great times session too! Yum!)

hmm should i keep this going oor not

Veer

Avatar: 2059 Thu Nov 13 08:18:14 -0500 2008
6

[Team Shortbus]

Level 32 Troll

my only complaint is that you people are happy

use the magma to set up a glbum-making forge

make a house out of glbum

wait is there sand ?_?

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