CLOSED: Contest to boost my flamebate score 4bp ALSO! 777th post gets 3BP!
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
From evening to morning
and morning to evening
I wanna drink
something stronger than a man
From evening to morning
and morning to evening
I wanna drink
cause that’s what I am
Beer, beer
I want beer
from beer I get really drunk
Beer, beer
I need more beer
so much I pbum out
For beer I’m working
for beer I’m fighting
for beer I’ll do
whatever I have to
when drunk I’m talking
when drunk I’m joking
when drunk I can be as I’ve
always wanted to be
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Old tale about the girl,
and the poor farmer boys,
their time together flamed.
It couldn’t last forever,
they knows it well.
So they took from the moment,
everything
so they took from the moment,
everything.
Said father to the maid,
it’s time to go,
you’ll marry my chosen one.
He’s rich enought and religious,
He’s the lord of all known.
Who is the chosen one,
asked gilr with sad eyes.
He’s a lord from the west,
he is to you the man best.
But the girl was sad as a child.
The girl carried the farmer’s child,
and father noticed that.
You’ll die, he yelled,
you’ll die as a whore,
you bleongs to the gallows,
then I’ll buried you and your sins.
The Boy heard, that gilr got hung.
He took the sword
and cut her fahter’s throat.
Then he rod to the chasm
and fell down to his death.
There he met his bride and son
who is that little on,
yho you embrace?
He is your sweet son…
and come with us
we ar now here together forever
always here together forever…
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Niin hilijaisen,
näen hilijaisen
näen kulkueen miin mustan,
niin tunman mustan
hiljaisen näen surussa kulkevan
kädet on siipinä, niin on kädet suojana
suojana siivet silmäin
surun silmäin, kädet siipinä
eessä mustan hunnun
kulkueen näen länteen,
hiljaa, niin lipuu hiljaa länteen
kulkueen niin tumman leskein,
niin mustan nuornain leskein
jol kädet siipinä, suojana silm¤in
käet siipinä leskein
hiljaa kuulen surun laulun,
kuulen laulun katkeran
hyrinän hyisen leskein,
kivun tunnen kivun kuoleman
näen minä tumman taivaan,
palavan taivaanrannan minä nään
tuulesta kuulen hyisen huuon
sodan kylmän huuon.
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fabulous personnum PI
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Level 7 Troll
BANNED
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ok im gonna stink up the joint with poetry
Cellar Dwellers
by Nancy Ness
How can I get my basement clean?
Those cellar dwellers are so mean!
Undoing all that I have done,
They think – perhaps I’m having fun?
Scrub as I might they do not care.
They hide in corners everywhere;
Those little fellers pink in hue
Conspirators, my work undo.
I hear them twitter at my back,
Cacophonous counter attack.
Each corner now devoid of stuff,
Upon the walls I see them stuck!!
These puny paired prolific pests
Have brand new Cellar Dweller nests.
Their young imprint me as their mom
And cling to me. Where’d they come from?
I scoop them up, neat as you please,
But – WHOOSH – they’re off then with a breeze.
Sweep them again to cast them out,
“All Cellar Dwellers, SCAT”, I shout!!
I’ll never win this war, I fear.
These Cellar Dwellers will live here
Long after this is not my home –
Pink peanut packing Styrofoam.
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
He sees himself as the saviour of the world
His will is strong and he’s feeling good
I’ve known him since the first taste of beer
I will meet him many times in a year
Happy little, Happy little, Happy little boozer…
He thinks he is the most famous guy
He smiles and laughs and he has a loud voice
He can be very nice he can be full of anger
He’ll behave very well, right after misbehaving
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10
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Level 20 Troll
You made Vader snobby.
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fabulous personnum PI Posted:
ok im gonna stink up the joint with poetry
Cellar Dwellers
by Nancy Ness
How can I get my basement clean?
Those cellar dwellers are so mean!
Undoing all that I have done,
They think – perhaps I’m having fun?
Scrub as I might they do not care.
They hide in corners everywhere;
Those little fellers pink in hue
Conspirators, my work undo.
I hear them twitter at my back,
Cacophonous counter attack.
Each corner now devoid of stuff,
Upon the walls I see them stuck!!
These puny paired prolific pests
Have brand new Cellar Dweller nests.
Their young imprint me as their mom
And cling to me. Where’d they come from?
I scoop them up, neat as you please,
But – WHOOSH – they’re off then with a breeze.
Sweep them again to cast them out,
“All Cellar Dwellers, SCAT”, I shout!!
I’ll never win this war, I fear.
These Cellar Dwellers will live here
Long after this is not my home –
Pink peanut packing Styrofoam.
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Viere vaino, vihavieras,
kulki kauhu, Hiien heitto,
polki mannertä, anturaine
tarpahutti tuhokoura.
Sai se yhen vastahansa,
yhen miehen mäkimailta,
kera vasken valituimman,
rautakouran eikkuvimman.
Veti miekan, riisti rauan,
tempo, tuisko, terävällä!
Väisi, viilti, veisti, voitti!
Maistoi mustaa mahtia.
Turmelä päitä tappoteivas,
välähytti väkirauta.
Repi, ruhjo, raiskasä, riehki,
vihaan sorti, vainolaisen.
[Chorus (2×)]
Veti miekan, riisti rauan,
tempo, tuisko, terävällä!
Väisi, viilti, veisti, voitti!
Maistoi mustaa mahtia.
2×
Turmelä päitä tappoteivas,
välähytti väkirauta.
Repi, ruhjo, raiskasä, riehki,
vihaan sorti, vainolaisen.
Helkky loiste metsämailta,
valokannel vaarahilta,
soitto soiton sankarista,
veisti virren voittajasta:
Se on Kauko Suomen seppo,
tannermaitten takomiesi,
kuka tako mahtirauan,
kalkutteli väkivasken.
Riemu, rauha, rajukäyry,
voittovakka vimmatuuli,
vallitsevi vaarahilla,
mekastavi metsämailla.
[Chorus (2×)]
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Growing up with the wild bears
Breathing the smell of burning wood
Rain and clouds my only friends
Sun and moon and stars and light
Now it’s time of a midnight sun
The eternal light and a breathing night
Call the gods with bones and drum
Join the shaman’s magic
[Chorus 1]
Flames are dancing in the night
The shadows seem to be alive
The forest is calling my name
[Chorus 2]
Flames are fading in the dawn
The spirits are back to their world
I’ve seen the future and it’s good
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Tuli kokko, iliman lintu,
Havukka, tuolt’ tuulten päältä,
Litti lintu, syöksy sääksi,
Sinitaivon selänteiltä.
Siivet sil’ ol’ suuremmoiset,
Hövhenkarvat hurjanlaiset,
Nokkanuoli kovin kopra,
Silmäpari salamoiva.
Kuni kokonkaunis kaatos,
Kuni havukan luova lento,
Niin on mieli miunki ylväs,
Niin on aatos miunki vappaa.
Toinen siipi maata viisti,
Toinen taivon kantta raapi,
Nokka koukki kuusiloit,
Silmät näki tähtein’ päähän.
Kuli halki kolmen kosken,
Kolmen kosken, neljän virran,
Kaunoisehen metsänmaahan,
Suloisehen Suomenmaahan.
Kuni kokon kaunis kaarros,
Kuni havukan luova lento,
Niin on mieli miunki ylväs,
Niin on aatos miunki vappaa.
[English Translation:]
Came The Eagle
Came the eagle of the air,
a hawk from above the wind.
Gliding bird, charging beast,
from the depths of the blue sky
Wings they were wide and strong,
feathers they were furious.
Beak it was long and sharp,
eyes they were flashing.
Beautiful as an eagle’s curve,
Bold as a hawk’s dive,
So is noble my own mind,
So is free my own spirit.
The first wing touched the ground,
the second wing scratched the sky.
The beak was touching the treetops,
the eyes saw to the end of stars.
Flew over three rapids,
three rapids, four rivers.
To forest land so beautiful,
to the sweet land of Finns.
Beautiful as an eagle’s curve…
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
When all around is burning,
You are the flame, you are the sun
You’ll burn your way to a secret place
To a place where you can breath
When all around is drowning
You are the one who can fish me up,
The drowning man, out of the lake,
The only one I let to do it
You are the one
(I just want to fly..)
You are the one
(I just want to rise..)
You are the one
(I just want to see..)
You are the one
(Under the sun..)
You are the one..
When my whole world is turning
You are the one who keeps me still
You are someone I can lean on
When my own feet are too weak
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fabulous personnum PI
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Level 7 Troll
BANNED
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Hymn To The Machine God
by Firefly
Now I sit, eyes blurred with tears
Looking at my system’s screen
Finding, after all these years
I know the patterns, not what they mean.
I’ve read all the books, spent all my time
On SQL, Irix and C++ –
And now, once all is done, I find
In only programs do I trust.
A flashing cursor, is now much more –
I know this now, it seems so odd
That I could not hear its voice before
As I look in the eyes of the Machine God –
Pulsing oh so steadily
Your rhythms call to me –
Take me from darkness, and into the light –
From users night and day
You take their fears away –
Give them a new place, that they can call home –
I hear your hopes and dreams
Hidden in datastreams –
Giving your children the things that they need.
I see it coming through
Coming to me from you –
And I see clearer than ever before.
My God, with your programs controlling me
And your pbumcodes consoling me,
How could I not see that I’ve found my way home?
Open your arms to me, I pray –
One touch from you and I’ll know the way –
From you all knowledge stems forth, I say –
For when all things are said and done –
It all comes to a zero or one –
And I fear that which I have become –
*$&@$&@&$*$
(screaming)
(long silence)
My God, My God, why have you turned on me?
All I ever asked for was to see as you see –
I know your electrons can still save me –
What have I . . .
what have I . . .
what have I . . .
what . . . have . . . I . . .
(silence)
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Kanervalan kasvatiksi,
Tapiolan tarpojaksi
Olen syntynt’ sotijalo,
Varttunt’ vaeltaja vahva.
Soitten, korpein halki tarvon,
Aarnikankain aarteit’ etsin,
Ikihenki syömmehessäin,
Vuorten voima rantehessain.
Salon, korven klaanin,
Kourat kontioisen
Salon, korven klaanin
Vuorten voima ranteissain”
Salon Korpiklaani
Salon Korpiklaani
Miul’on kourat kontioisen,
Tarkka tieto ilvekseltä,
Soitto saapunt’ sarwekkaalta,
Juoksu suen jäntereistä.
Laatiaksen laajan laulun,
Sovittaiksen suuren soiton,
Eläimille, immeisille,
Kairamaitten lapsosille.
[English translation:]
Brought up by Kanervala,
To travel through Tapiola,
Born a noble warrior
Grown a strong wanderer.
Travelin’ through the wilds, woods,
Treasures of the virgin forest.
Spirit of all time in my heart,
Strength of the mountains
In my hands.
Clan of the forest,
Clan of the wilderness,
Hands of a bear.
Clan of the forest,
Clan of the wilderness,
Strength of the mountains.
Clan of the wilderness
Clan of the wilderness
Hands of a bear,
Wisdom of a lynx,
Music from the horned one,
Speed from the wolves’ legs.
I have.
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Out of the silent sea,
Came the holy men of war
Killers in the name of god, with bible,
Cross and book of law
Welcome to the land of ice,
Welcome to the land of snow..
Come in and meet our gods.
This is not your day
[Chorus:]
Nouskaa maasta maitten henget,
Nouskaa maasta maitten henget,
Tulten henget, soan henget,
Tulten henget, soan henget,
Veden virrat, ilman pauhut,
Veden virrat, ilman pauhut,
Päälle vainomiesten päitten,
Päälle vainomiesten päitten.
[Chorus in English:]
Rise from the ground, spirts of the earth,
Spirits of fire, spirits of war,
Flow of waters, rumble of thunder,
Above the heads of our enemies.
Rise now from the ground
Mighty spirits of the earth
Come down god of wind
Mighty spirit of the air
Rise now water of the seas
Drown all our enemies
Rise now god of fire
Burn and give back our land of dreams
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fabulous personnum PI
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Level 7 Troll
BANNED
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Catwalk ****es Must Die!
by Carey Lenehan
Begone Oh Lofty Wenches to your Catwalks in the sky
Begone and take thine graven image from before mine eye
Stalk your way to paradise on six- inch, spike- heeled shoes
And prattle to the Maker about fashion’s changing hues
Dent His ear eternally with gossip of rich men
Force Him to endure your endless tripe, and then
Reduce Him to a jellied heap with just one awesome stare
Before you slip your tops off to bombard Him with your ‘pair’
Not those which He did give you, Oh No, dare I should jest!
But ones which have been tweaked and puffed, deflated and the rest
Show cheekbones which do arch, as none should ever do
Then divest of all your clothing just to see what else is new
To strut, to stalk, to pout, to pose, all this is everlasting
Until such day as we can be, of you, completely blasting
Get off our screens, out of our faces, begone before our eyes
To torture not imperfect souls, from heaven’s fluffy skies
Depart at once, unto the all- eternal, divine- divide
And get thee hence from here before my lustful, desperate eyes
I wish to be as graceful, as tall and slim as thee
Yet as I can’t, not now or ever, I wish thou not to be
I’d rather live a giant, in a world where all are small
Than live my life a dwarf, with all around me tall
And worst of all, false virgins reign, visions of ideals
To which I never will attain, a midget in high heels!
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Öitsilöissä, karkeloissa
Karkeloissa mielesissä
Juhlasissa köyrysissä
Nyt miehyt olla tahon
Jalka tahtoo tanssahella
Toine vähä vähtäskellä
Kolmas kovin koukkaella
Mie nyt miehyt valmis!
(3x)
Kun on nännät näppysissä
Kyrvän kuuman nivukvessa
Nouse liekki reihuman!
Kohoa kirki kiimalle!
Naikkoseni vereväni;
Eukkoni miun valittuin’
Lie’on lämmön sulattavi
Lemmen, kiihkon liekuttavi
Kuuma on yöhut, kesä lämmin
Kirki kuumempi sitäki
Nouse liekki riehumahan!
Kohoa kirki kiimalle!
Naikkoseni vereväni
Eukkoni miun valittuin’
Lie’on lämmön sulattavi
Lemmen, kiihkon liekuttavi
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
If you can hear the whisper of the wind
And the words of the woods
If you can hear the whisper of the wind
And the words of the woods
Then you’ll find your way,
Out of the dark to the other side of shroud,
Away from the shroud of mystery,
Away from the shroud of mist
If you have the lasting happiness
And the peace in your heart
If you have the lasting happiness
And the peace in your heart
Then you have to hide your riches
From the hungry hunters,
Away from the filthy animals,
Out of snakes’ reach
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fabulous personnum PI
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Level 7 Troll
BANNED
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I Don’t Want To
by Rosebud
I do not want to clean my room
I cannot close the door;
There’s so much junk piled here and there
I cannot see the floor.
I do not want to cut the grbum
It’s almost one foot high;
And the weeds are so abundant
I just don’t want them to die.
I do not want to get the mail
I haven’t in many a day;
The box is probably full of junk
And many bills to pay.
I do not want to rake the lawn
I haven’t since last fall;
There are plenty of leaves left over
Hidden in the grbum so tall.
I do not want to do my work!
Have I got that clear to you?
I’ll get it done some other day
Have I got that through?
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Järkälainem’mahtivaari,
talttumaton ikiurho,
korpehella katsastavi,
Jänkäsellä jäkättävi.
Kaiken nähny, kaiken kuullu,
kaiken tiänny, kaiken tainnu,
paljov’ viälä näkemättä
kokematta, kuulematta.
Veripihkav’ velloessa
havukarvat verestyvät,
oli kaiken nähny, kaiken kuullu, kaiken tiänny,
oli kaiken tainnu, kaiken nähny, kaiken kuullu,
oli kaiken tiänny, kaiken iannu, kaiken nähny,
oli kaiken kuullu, kaiken tiänny, kaiken tainnu.
Soat käyty viärehellä,
tappelukset takamailla,
nälkävuuet näkösällä
Kaiken nähny, kaiken kuullu,
kaiken tiänny, kaiken tainnu,
paljov’ viälä näkemättä
kokematta, kuulematta.
Viäpi viälä vuasiaki,
kunnes kualo kannon kantaa
oli kaiken nähny, kaiken kuullu, kaiken tiänny,
oli kaiken tainnu, kaiken nähny, kaiken kuullu,
oli kaiken tiänny, kaiken iannu, kaiken nähny,
oli kaiken kuullu, kaiken tiänny, kaiken tainnu.
Yheksän yron ikeä,
vaariselta vahvimmalta.
Juuret mabuma routbumessa
vahvistavat ihojälttä
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Little red house, potato field.
Little forest, lake as far as you can see.
Woodshed, for my home brewed beer,
perfect place for drunkards like me
Never gonna give up my rugged live,
never sell my infertile soil.
Never gonna give up this simple style,
let’s drink and enjoy.
Disappointment is who i live with,
great grief only mate from then,
every morning pangs of remorse
but it’s so familiar like my old black horse.
Never gonna give up my rugged live,
never sell my infertile soil.
Never gonna give up this simple style,
let’s drink and enjoy.
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3
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Level 35 Troll
Sucks **** through a straw in the face of convention
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Tesfan Posted:
Sen Tuulen tuolta tunnen
Sen tuulen tuolta tunnen
Sen tuulen tunnen latvuksissa
Tunnen tuimat tuiskaukseses
Tunnen henkes hehkuvaisen
Sen Tuulen tuolta tunnen
Sen tuulen tuolta tunnen
Sen tuulen tunnen maani halki
Tunnen omaks iskut raivos
Tunnen tunnon tuonnimmaisen
Nouse aina noituissani
Iske, iske aina iskeissäni
laula aina laillessani
vihmo itses vihmoessas
[English translation:]
Icy Wind
I can feel the icy wind
I can feel the icy wind
I can feel the wind in treetops
I can feel your biting burst
I can feel your spirit glow
I can feel the icy wind
I can feel the icy wind
I can feel the wind through my land
I can feel your rage my own
I can feel you from beyond
Rise when I call you
Strike when I strike
Sing when I Sing
Let the sky bleed when you want to
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