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UnlimitedANC's Flamebate Posts
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CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Well now I feel like a defender of justice.
...
**** you guys, I AM SAILOR MOON. (view post) |
11/26/2008 | |
3BP - Same old boring contestSure thing, takkun. (view post) |
11/26/2008 | |
CONTEST: Slash fiction, Forumwarz style! 8 BP up for grabs + Unique E-Peen!!!!!“Don’t get me wrong, man. I know that ostensibly it sounds gay, but it’s a cool game.” “For the last time – no. I won’t play ‘just the head’ with you, you giant minge.”
Jason sighed and shook his head, unwilling to pander to Mike’s latest advance. They’d been friends for a long time – having met sophomore year at Brown in a societal theory lecture. They were the only two people laughing during the topic “9-11 and CHANGE,” after Mike had kept making the same stupid Bowie joke every time the professor said “changes.”
Weak, admittedly… but this was about two months after the towers, so yeah. Mike was always… there, that way. Stupid humor, but also… kind of ingenious. Kind of daring.
“Grow up, douchefabulous person. I’m talking about implementing that Asteroids knock-off in the next episode.” “I knew that, Mike — I was answering your question from later tonight.” “Hardy ****ing harr, jackbum. Seriously though – asteroids?”
Sometimes, just sometimes, Jason wished that Mike would grow up… But really, he couldn’t help but smile. Mike had always been there for him – a real bro. The two finished up their drinks – Jason had ordered a double mocha chai decaf (soy milk, his stomach was just a bit sensitive) while Mike, ****ing Michael, had told the barista “surprise me.” The end result of that was usually something mundane like a hot chocolate (with spit in it)... but he loved hot chocolate anyway.
The two got in Jason’s Previa, and started to drive back to the office, rocking out to the ballads of journey that Mike had handpicked for their little morning-meeting commutes. For a couple of “infantile twits” (as Sandy Burkess had noted when she broke up with Mike – ****ing lesbo) the boys had done alright. They both worked for a company they’d started right out of college with a few friends. Together they made internet games and some bumorted humor media on the web – granted, they hadn’t blown up like the Onion or anything, but these young men did quite alright for themselves. “Crotch Zombie,” they called it, after an old in-joke dating back to a LAN party they’d thrown around the release of Half-Life 2.
“Back to the grind, right old chum?” Jason chuckled as he nudged his pal with a wink and a faux-knowing elbow. “God, Jason! Always with the bumsex. Could you cool down for just a minute, male reproductive organs McGee?” Mike zinged in return.
The two laughed, and Jason began to open the doors to the office… but as he began to turn the key, he noticed that the door had already been unlocked.
“Did… were they going to pull an all-nighter to finish balancing the emo buffs last night?” Jason male reproductive organed his head to the side slightly, hoping to have his worried allayed. “I thought they pulled an all-nighter to finish glazing your face last night, stud.” Mike replied, snarky as ever. “That ****ing cleaning lady we hired probably came early, man. Don’t bust your ****.” “Yeah, probably… just… she was supposed to lock back up after she came in, right?” “Sure. She was also supposed to have a greencard, but we both know how that goes.”
They laughed. Once again one of Mike’s clever jokes had diffused an otherwise intolerable situation. God, he was cute sometimes… Jason would’ve thought, if he was gay. He wasn’t, though. He… wasn’t. The two made their way to the elevator, up to 6th… and strode happily by the rows of cubicles towards the conference room. Joking aside, they still had some prep-work to do for this morning’s meeting and-
...
From across the hall, the two stopped dead. The light was ON.
“Mike?” “No jokes, man. I’ll call security…” “Hold- holdup. I wanna get a closer look…”
They crept closer to the office, trying to stay crouched close to the wall. Mike was fumbling with his iphone, trying to call security, but rattled, he kept sliding it too hard to work the damn thing. As they got close enough to see through the office’s side window, they could see just inside. A woman, bent over a table, struggling and violently pounding at her was… wait… was… Spider-Man?
“Oh****oh****oh****…” “Someone’s being ****ing raped in our ****ing office, Jesus ****ing ****, man, ****ing… ****! What do we do, Jason?” “Call ****ing security, I’m going to slam the door open, see if I can surprise th-” “Are you ****ing insane, man? The guy’s a ****ing serial nutjob. He broke into an office dressed like ****ing Spider-Man, and now I he’s raping the cleaning lady!” “Mike… run – get security. NOW!” “Jason… I don-”
Jason put a hushed finger to Mike’s lips, then he pulled him in, and kissed him, pbumionately. Maybe it was the rush of adrenaline, maybe it was the weirdness of the situation, but… jesus. Years of emotion flowed out, and Mike reciprocated, the two locked in a burning miasma of tongue and saliva for what seemed like an eternity… before Jason gently pulled away.
“Mike, I’m sorry, I…” “Sorry… that you didn’t tell me sooner?”
Tears in his eyes, Jason smiled… and Mike smiled back, that male reproductive organy douchebag grin.
“I love you, Michael… I always have.” “I love you too Jason, you… GIANT fabulous person! SURPRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE!!!”
The door to the office swung open, as the man in the Spider-Man suit leaned in to get a better view with the camcorder he’d been holding on them through the office window.
“How do I shot gay, ****?” “ROBIN. You ****ing BASTARD. You manipulative, evil ****ing…” “Trout?”
Robin stuck his tongue out as he thrust his Spider-bulge in Jason’s face.
“Jesus, do you know how much I had to pay Lupita to help me set that up?” He laughed, as the flustered cleaning lady nodded politely and ran out of the room at top speed. “Seriously, though. God Jay… I can’t believe what a fabulous person you are. Awesome.”
“So… what, what now? Is this blackmail? Are you guys going to tell my parents tha-”
“Going to what?!?” Mike interjected. “Dude, this is fantastic ****ing news. I’m seriously totally gay for you.” “Oh no, you’re… wait. What?”
“It’s true,” Robin continued. “Actually, I should be pretty ****ed. I totally lost a bet, here. I mean, I always thought that ‘Jalapeno Bootyhole’ was a pseudonym, not a descriptor. God, you a ****ing furry, too?” “Ease up on him, Trout. You’re buying us lunch, after all.”
Jason sat there, dazed, his heart still pounding. “I don’t understand… why the Spider-Man outfit?”
“Oh… Rob just wanted to **** with Lupita’s head.” “Yeah. If you want to work here, please type “I am not easily offended!”” Rob quipped, with a chuckle.
“But seriously Jay… I’ve always loved you too. I accidentally called Spidey over here about everything last month. I was drunk as a ****ing sorority girl, and started just blurting out how gay I was for you… and he’s been riding my bum about it for weeks-” “Figuratively – don’t get jealous now.” Robin interjected.
“So all this was…”
“Well, I had to see if you felt the same way, and this crazy **** over here wanted to make a bet of it. So… here we are.” “Wow… just… ****, man. You could’ve just told me. I mean, it would’ve been weird but not… this ****. Jesus.”
“Alright, kids… let’s go grab that lunch and afterwards… **** it. Take the afternoon off. Jason, you’re stressed as hell here, Mike, you go help him relieve some of that tension.”
Robin smiled at his friends, as they all headed to the elevator… same as it ever was. Jason and Mike laughing – now hand-in hand, Robin striding behind them. The boys had come a long way since college, alright.
Of course… Robin now knew what he had to do. He smiled and they all laughed, but then… just under his breath… he plotted:
“He was mine, Jason. You wormy little ****ing fabulous person… he was MINE!”
...!
THE END?
Log in to see images! (view post) |
11/25/2008 | |
CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Well I already sent the BP, but **** it, let’s get a mode in here to confirm. TROUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT! (view post) |
11/25/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?Mjolnir Posted:
I live in Hsinchu. Google it. (view post) |
11/23/2008 | |
CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Sorry I haven’t checked in here yet. Vuron – you coulda tubmailed me, man. Anyway, your BP has been sent. Kudos!
ALSO: I ****ING KNEW IT. So glad I didn’t drop my time on that ****. Although I’m also curious how much it sells for… has to at least be high value in that regard, for such low value in gameplay.
I’d really love for ET or someone else in the know to weigh in on this; is it really supposed to be a joke item? Shouldn’t the stats have at least been funny? That’s… a pretty ****ing weak joke, guys.
So yeah. Done. Big ups and thanks to all who participated. (view post) |
11/23/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?Acid Flux Posted:
OIC. That does make sense. He sat on forum visits… Nope, not up to it.
I’ll go back to failing at life by NOT having to wake up at 8 AM (time differences, what a whore) to get raped in the last ten minutes of Dom. (view post) |
11/20/2008 | |
CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Sorry about that. First time doing a contest. (view post) |
11/20/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?So he just happen to pwn his, what 96th forum in a row in the last 10 minutes of a round? How the **** do you even plan that in advance?
Doesn’t matter. Found that that Dom is only for e-peen and medals anyway, stopped caring. Thought that winning medals would actually get me something. (view post) |
11/20/2008 | |
CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Wylin Posted:
What he said. At 50 pieces, it’s rampantly spec’d to be the mother of all .moar files but unfortunately some of the pieces are stupidly rare. I spent a good long while mining for it about two weeks back, and got… I think 4 more parts after a week straight. So far, nobody is known to have completed the file.
Sitting here with only 12 to show, I’m tired of it… Especially since given the nature of the item I’m guessing it’s designed to be a Troll grail. If that were the case, it may be worthless to me… hence the contest. (view post) |
11/20/2008 | |
Earbleeders in ppwn shop!As a camwhore, will there be any gear from another clbum that I should be looking out for? Or are we basically the only ones getting screwed out of our exclusive **** becoming common while everyone points and laughs? (view post) |
11/20/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?PS – I just got hit by 12 thiefs from the same guy, while another in our bracket gained around 50 pistachio scoops over 2 minutes.
If I’m not using ‘exploits’ properly, then someone SURE AS HELL is. (view post) |
11/19/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?Acid Flux Posted:
Yeah, but I’m not denying that. Thing is, in the last 12 hours I realized I’d have been ****ed in Dom anyway. So my personal pity party has cleared out. All the same, I do believe I got ****ed over without warning due to a bug, and that shouldn’t happen. Period. (view post) |
11/19/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?UnlimitedANC Posted:
Quoted for ignorant people who fail to realize that I no longer care about the ‘divine retribution’ I received, but would still like the bug attended to. Learn to read, thanks.
You guys are right, I don’t deserve to get **** back, but I’m still trying to highlight the problem. Would’ve happened whether I got greedy after the first run-in or not – and I’d like for it not to happen to others. (view post) |
11/19/2008 | |
POLL: Should downvoting in Forumbuildr be eliminated?Removing downvoting seems a solid plan. When I put actual thought into my ideas, then see them get dropped in favor of people upvoting idiocy like “OH EM GEE necrophilisa joke guiz!” it’s pretty discouraging.
All the same, how about a minimum number of daily upvotes needed to survive the day? That’d prevent the flooding. If that’s not harsh enough, cap the number of times a user can +1vote each day. Say you have 5 upvotes to use each day. Pbum until you find your 5, then you’re done. Meanwhile, your forum needs at least say, 10 upvotes to be around tomorrow and stay in the running. If people can’t just upvote **** like there’s no tomorrow, 5 votes will be a little harder to get.
Makes sense, no? (view post) |
11/18/2008 | |
CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Inertia Posted:
If someone already has it, they haven’t shared that information. Easy BP right here for them, if they do. (view post) |
11/18/2008 | |
CLOSED: CONTEST: 1 BP to the first person who gets the Pink Floyd .moar file.Here’s the deal: I recently won a brownie point in another contest. All the same, I don’t want to buy any of the hacks/avatar mod ****… and I figure Ep.3 will cost enough that I’ll need more than a few BP anyway. So, I’m feeling charitable.
But this ain’t gonna come free – I want some information. Namely, one BP is heading to the first one of you who can put together the ‘Pink Floyd – Darkside full album’ .moar file. I need proof, copypasta of the full stats, and a screenshot. One of the higher-ups should be able to come by and make sure nobody tards around in PS and makes some **** up.
This will not only help you (the thing’s so ****ing rare you’d probably even get an e-peen,) but the entire community of those of us chasing the damn thing without knowing if it’s even good for our clbumes, or if it’s a major ****ing wash.
Happy hunting!
Good luck. (view post) |
11/18/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?Seriously. Whether or not it’s an ‘exploit’ with ‘consequences,’ my initial run-in with it was accidental, and I still would’ve lost 4 scoops or a dom card, which – yes – could break a whole ****ing round.
I’m done bawwwing about personal cirgreat timesstance, because I’m still enough of a Domfabulous person addict to be going for min scoops now as a consolation prize… but the bug should still be fixed, here. (view post) |
11/18/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?If there wasn’t any explicitly stated repercussion, how exactly were the consequences justified? All I was trying to do in refreshing was et the card I originally wanted, not stack or dupe anything.
But then, while some people get e-peen for finding exploits, I apparently just get raped. Given my luck, it figures. ****ing… whatever. I’ll win next week, if I still give a ****. (view post) |
11/18/2008 | |
Bug just ****ed me out of 24 Lemon Scoops... or 6 Domination Cards?Johnny Mac Posted:
“Your fault for not foreseeing that you were encountering glitches.” Thanks, Captain Foresight.
I might even agree with you, were people not receiving rollbacks for stacking Venuses before the economy broke, or had I not been ****ed out of my Dom win the first week of Ep.2 because some people claimed that speedrun times ‘didn’t seem balanced enough.’ Forget that, I didn’t win on lemon scoops anyway.
This is a legitimate glitch, and I’ve seen people compensated for baw-ing about **** like that… so I’d like some restitution myself. (view post) |
11/17/2008 |
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